Saturday

I will tackle you to the ground

There are just some things you will fight anything and everyone for.  I call it being passionate about what you love.  *shifty eyes*  Or crazy.

I was your typical preteen though my parents would maybe beg to differ.  OKAY FINE.  I was a nightmare from the time I was mobile/vocal.  I made them question their sanity and ability to survive another child if it turned out like me.  Eventually they gave up and had two more kids but luckily for the parents they were a bit tamer than me.  To call me over dramatic is an understatement.

One lazy preteen Saturday I was feeling extremely needy for some chocolate.   It was probably that time where a girl craves salty and sweet more often and I was looking for some chocolate to fulfill my needs.  Any chocolate would do.  Usually, I would find my mom and throw myself on the floor and roll around whine until she told me I was weird and send me on a frantic quest in the kitchen.

My mom was in the kitchen this time, and I walked in there prepared to throw myself down right there in the kitchen floor in desperation.  She had just finished cleaning something up and I supersighed to get her to turn around.

*supersigh*
"MOOOOOOOOM, do we have any chocolate?  I NEEEED IT.  I am just going to DIE!"

She turned with a guilty look on her face.  She had just taken a bite.  Of a cookie.  A chocolate chip cookie.  I dropped my jaw right on the floor as she shrugged.  With her mouth full, she said  "I'm sorry!  This is the last one! But you can have a bite of it."

Then it happened.  She held the cookie out, and I was prepared to say NO! ITS NOT THE SAME in a dramatic fashion when a lowly chocolate chip FLEW out of the cookie and in slow mo I watched it fall to the floor.  At the same time I saw it hit the floor, so did my Miniature Sheltie.  We looked at each other, me and the dog, but more me at her.  She started for that chocolate chip and I dove for the ground, grabbed the dog by the neck and put her in a half neslon just at the second her tongue was about to stick out and lap up the chocolate chip.  I screamed "NO! MY CHOCOLATE CHIP!", held the dog down and picked up the chocolate chip.  Though it felt like a 10 minute struggle it was only .002 seconds.

My mom, who was watching of course, nearly dropped her cookie right out of her hand.  Her eyes popped right out of her head and said "BRI! YOU ARE NOT GONNA EAT THAT OFF THE--"

In triumph I stuck that chocolate chip right in my mouth from the floor, and millimeters from the dogs tongue.  I didn't care.  It was a chocolate morsel.  I assume the look of bliss came over my face and it was comical to her.  That or she was wondering what she did wrong in raising me, that I would wrestle a dog to the ground for a teeny tiny chocolate chip.  Or maybe it was the whole scenario that played out in front of her eyes while she was trying to chew her first bite of cookie.  Whatever it was, she doubled over in hysterical laughter and could barely speak the words.

"Good Lord, Bri!" *howling cackles* "I could have given" *snorts and laughs* "You the rest" *chokes on bite and continues to giggle* "of this cookie!"  *hysterical fits of uncontrollable laughter*

"No, I just wanted the chocolate, I am good now."  I said, and walked out of the kitchen leaving my mom to pee her pants in privacy.

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